Went for my first Xmas "party" yesterday and met one of my friend, X 's boyfriend called Dan. And I wonder if love is really blind... Let me recap my encounter with that fellow.
I stepped out of the MRT and saw Pam talking with X. Then halfway through our conversation, Dan popped out with a little wave and shy smile and X introduced him.
Lai's thought: He is so insignificant that I didn't even notice his presence and can't he open his mouth to introduce himself and say "hi"? Aiyah, never mind X likes him can already.
Then we reached the function room where the party was held and we met up with Jan who had invited us. So the 5 of us sat on the sofa but only 4 girls were talking. Dan didn't even attempted to join in the conversation or pretend to look interested, let alone contribute to the conversation.
Lai's thought: He is so anti-social, which I actually told X the exact same words and X defended saying he has running nose and is shy. Ok but at least he could try to look interested or apologise for his non-chalance right? Points deducted again. Oh my... I am beginning to wonder if he is mute. Totally no social skills at all!
Moving on, all the participants of the party sat in a circle playing some ice-breaking games. Initially everyone is required to introduce themselves. And I am totally speechless after hearing Dan's self-introduction...
Dan: Hi, I am Dan. That's it.
Everyone else had spoken more than those words. In the 2nd round of the game, Dan was requested to change seat. Dan was shy and didn't want to change. To make things more ugly, X and Dan were grabbing each other hands and X even jumped to Dan's defence saying its alright that Dan will sit beside her. The tone was rather hostile.
Lai's thought: WTF! Come on, its just a game. Be more spontaneous and its just departure from your beloved one for less than half an hour. *roll my eyes* Does he even has balls? Why does X have to jump to his defence, can't he fend for himself or just take it in the spirit of the game?
Though ultimately Dan has changed seats and we had our feast after the game, Dan didn't speak a single socialising word anymore other than "thank you" when someone handed him the log cake. I think he has spoken a maximum of 10 words since I first met him at the MRT station.
So announcement to all guys out there... please attempt to socialise more. You don't need to be like Moh who starts his pick up line with "hey beautiful". If you don't have anything to contribute to the conversation, at least make an attempt to look interested. And if the topic of conversation is beyond your appreciation, please excuse yourself. Oh yah and don't start fiddling with your gf hands after meal while she is having conversation with rest of people. I guess the only time where a guy is pardon for not being socialable is when he is damn good looking or he has the substance (e.g. intellectually brilliant) to afford to be quiet cos the rest of people are beyond his frequency. Sad to say, Dan falls in neither category.
Other tips for guys out there... Minimise the use of texting on mobile phone while on dates. The signal the other party is receiving is "hey, am i not worth your undevoted attention". Its not a good feeling so yup avoid that. Then while texting to girls, please use comma and full stop and do not use short form to the extent that it gives headache for the receiver of the sms. Moreover, don't try to deceive the lady saying you are driving her to dessert but end up driving her to your doorstep and claiming you have friends inside when there is only A pair of shoes at the doorstep. That's called trying too hard and being desperate. You can forget about asking the lady for a 2nd date ever.
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